By Rachel
No one was more shocked than me when I won a contest put on by Steaz, which paid for my ticket to Blissdom. I was thrilled! Well, thrilled AND scared. I felt totally unworthy of such a gift, mostly due to the fact that my blog does not have a large readership/following.
After winning the ticket, I was determined to kick my blogging butt into high gear. Twitter became a part of my daily life as I spent many hours networking with other attendees. I also changed the name of my blog, got business cards, and started making a point to write regularly. My readership grew, my sense of self and identity was stronger, and I was ready to jump head-first into my first conference. And oh, the outfits. I got SO many cute outfits!
As soon as I entered the hotel, my confidence waned. I was scared, and my fear turned me into a geek at a high school football party. I approached people, as advised, but had no idea what to say. When asked about my blog, I would shrug the question off and say something like “Well, I don’t really have any readers,” or “I’m probably the smallest blog at this conference.”
I had a blast at Blissdom, and everyone really WAS as nice as I was told they would be, and I made many new friends. But I realized once I got home and began reading other peoples’ re-cap posts that I had consistently sold myself short—to myself, to other bloggers, to companies and PR professionals in attendance. When I watched the video interview I did with Hallmark at the conference, I was pissed.
Here it is. You only need to watch the first 52 seconds:
Did you catch that?! When asked to describe my blog, I flippantly listed some things I blog about and said, “You know, random…” and moved on. D’oh! I had just done it again! And this time, ON CAMERA! Like, there’s a record of it! I vowed as soon as I saw the video to cease and desist all short-selling. I have a purpose and a voice in this community, and so does everyone else.
Here is my advice to you newbies (and to myself — I still consider myself a newbie just because I want a do-over. Hey, this is my guest post, I make the rules):
- Do NOT under any circumstances sell yourself short. Your blog is important, even if your mom is the only person who reads it.
- The reason you are at this conference is to learn. That means you don’t know everything (or, like me, ANYTHING), so it’s okay to ask questions and be uncomfortable.
- When all else fails, “fake it ‘til you make it” is my new philosophy. When it comes to confidence, it doesn’t really matter if you feel confident or not. If you act like you are confident, people will see you as confident. So act like it already.
- You are WORTHY of this conference. You are part of the community.
- People want to meet you. They may not know who you are yet, but that’s the whole point of meeting, isn’t it?
With all that being said, if I see you at a conference and you describe your blog to me in such a way that diminishes your importance in the blogging community, I will ask you to stop and try again. You’ve been warned, and you have great resources, including this site, to help you out. Get on Twitter, and don’t be afraid to make friends and connections. We’re all in this together, and supporting each other is what we do. Go get ‘em, Tiger!
About the Author:
Rachel Boldman blogs at Not Just A… where she writes about extremely important things, none of which are “random” in any way. She has an important husband, and a toddler who matters, too. You can follow her confident tweets by following @BoldRach4X.
Great post! I think I sell myself short a lot.
You’re not alone. I think many of us do in one way or another. Especially if we are newer to blogging. It goes back to the thought that there are some bloggers on pedestals. Take those pedestals away though and we are all just bloggers in one big community!
This is so true! We were all there to learn, and most of us are still growing readership, but confidence will take you a long way when networking and building up your blog. Own the wonderful work you do every day!
@ehood
This blog post was absolutely on point for a lot of new bloggers and some that have been blogging for years (as a hobby). We sell ourselves short because we compare ourselves to others who may have more readers, more brand opportunities, and be more “techy”. But you are so right in saying “Fake it until you make it”. That is not to say…don’t learn and implement anything. But if you don’t take yourself seriously, no one else will.
Yikes! I needed to hear this one today! I just contacted one of my favorite authors via email and she asked me to review her latest book on my blog. And all I can think is that once she sees my little blog, she’s going to think it’s a waste of time to have me review it. I think I’m also going to live by the philosophy fake it til you make it.
Thanks for this!
Kristy, good for you! Just be confident. Like Kathy said, “If you don’t take yourself seriously, no one else will!”
I think that “selling yourself short” is a problem for most women, as society has traditionally told us what we HAVE to be; and that usually isn’t “confident and self-assured.” Also, since we as women put others first (children, husbands, etc) so often, maybe we downplay our accomplishments so no one thinks we’re conceited?
What do you think?
Rachel Boldman
@BoldRach4X
Yea, you’re the cool aunt…..ok so you’re just about the only aunt!
I wanted to meet you! And was glad I did, although it was briefly. This is a great post and I bet others will benefit from it.